195 Comments
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Ally Hamilton's avatar

I’d like to co-sign this 900 times. I spent so much of my life trying to be a good girl, and all it does is make you sick. It’s bullshit. It keeps you small and always feeling like you’re somehow or another not good enough. Vindictive? Because you had the audacity to stand up for yourself? Bwahahaha. Bring. It. On.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Hell yes. It never benefits us, just the people who want us to stay small. Thank you Ally!

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Runs with Dogs's avatar

Oh my goodness YES! You hit the nail in the head!

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Merritt McKeon's avatar

If this hasn’t gotten sorted yet, pm me. Your lawyer friend who knows a thing or two about this sort of thing. Much love. Merritt

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Ohhhh I will!!

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BATC's avatar

“You don’t accrue points for good behavior, you only get them docked when you stop being a doormat.”

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

So true right?

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Carly Jacobs's avatar

This was an amazing read thank you.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Thank you so much

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Matt Stalker's avatar

This was a transforming write up. Sticks with you.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Thank you ❤️

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jude's avatar

"I don’t want to be a good girl anymore. It’s unsustainable."

thank you, michelle, for sharing so transparently.

i'm 69 and a recovering good girl.

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Verity Wright's avatar

I love this- really resonates for me!

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Michelle DiMauro's avatar

I love this - great writing and GOOD FOR YOU!

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Aimee Touton's avatar

Resonates so much! Going through the process now of not being a crowd pleaser anymore...it feels good.

Thanks for sharing

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

It's hard work to change but not harder than staying the same. I'm glad you're doing it too.

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bluePNWcats's avatar

Oh my God. I feel this piece so intensely. I burn with that same bitter realization that I was sold a total package of lies and even worse than that, that I bought it for as long as I did. I'm nearly 48 and I am just now really digging into the meat of all my shit. I was a good girl too and all it got me was hurt...

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Emily's avatar

Not only is this post liked, it's mad LOVED.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

The response has been INCREDIBLE. I’ve been blushing for days.

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Sandy Corbett Ballesteros's avatar

You were an amazing little girl, and have obviously grown up to be a bad ass woman!!!

Love all your insights of navigating life by your own rule book!

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Sandy! Well I’m a lot more bad ass because I learned all about The Stones from you ❤️

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Denise Collins's avatar

Kudos to all of you who may be classified as "difficult" for speaking your truth and taking care of yourself and refusing to co-sign others' bullshit. Call me difficult too, and as a recovering woman figuring out life one day, one job, one partner at a time, difficult is a compliment and means I am likely not your doormat. Not today. Perhaps this is why I enjoy cooking - my expectations are rarely unreasonable.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Exactly! Let’s stop being afraid of being called difficult. They’re going to call us names no matter what.

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Lauren Gamboa's avatar

So much truth so beautifully shared. Thank you for this piece it is so needed.

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Michelle Albanes-Davis's avatar

Thank you so much. I know you can relate ❤️

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Larissa Hennessy's avatar

Fair play to you! We should reframe it, being called a Bitch is a good thing. It means we stand up for ourselves !

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